Creating and maintaining boundaries is important to for building healthy relationships and developing your own confidence and self-worth. There are lots of personal boundaries you might set, but here are a few that I think can help you right away — whether it’s with a friend or your significant other.
You have that person you want to get closer to, but they aren’t that into you right now, or perhaps they seem to be waiting for something, someone, maybe just a better offer.
Don’t put your life on hold hoping that they will eventually come around and eventually decide to reciprocate the feelings. Live your life in the present and treat yourself fairly in the process, too.
And remember, a little self-compassion goes a long way, too.
We’ve all seen this on social media. There are people who live to “show” everyone how important they are, how many friends they have, or even how glamorous their daily life is.
Don’t get caught up in all that.
In fact, learn to see through the hype and move beyond it. True friendships aren’t based on what you wear, where you eat, or how many shiny new objects you’ve purchased. It’s all about being real, human, and sharing life experiences together.
The memories you make together are what make life worth living.
Don’t accept lying
Some people can’t help themselves. They talk themselves up in the beginning and even believe their own hype, making promises they cannot keep and have no intention to.
Their personality changes quickly or they end up disappearing once they’re expected to deliver. When that person is unable to discuss the future with you, then maybe they don’t want you to think you’re going to be a part of theirs.
Trust, without control
Healthy relationships don’t revolve around one person’s desire to be in control.
Whether it’s you or your partner exhibiting this behavior, seek out equality in the relationship rather having one of you dominate the other. In loving relationships, it’s best to fully understand one another.
Take some time to figure the other person out — if it’s your significant other, take the love languages quiz and find out exactly who your partner is and what they really need from the relationship.
No lazy communication
Communication is the bedrock of any solid relationship.
Smart phones have become a ubiquitous part our lives. We text, email, instant message, and send pictures and emojis around the world like there’s no tomorrow. But, somewhere along the way, we’ve stopped communicating directly.
Don’t fall into that trap.
Every text message is open to interpretation: i.e. what is he/she trying to tell me, but not saying? Texting is lazy communication and creates distance. It’s perfect for people who are emotionally unavailable and is not a good substitute for talking interactively.
Avoid relationships that are built around texting. Better yet, use the phone for what it was originally intended: calling someone.
There are lots of other boundaries you can set that will make your life simpler. These are just a few that you can adopt now to make your relationships stronger.
Think about other boundaries that will make your life less complicated and, hopefully, help you build a stronger connection.
At Motivations Counseling, we want to help you to resolve emotional issues of the past and the present. Together, we can open the door to you finding a brighter and more confident future.
Call us today for a free 10-minute consultation to see if our approach and experience are right for you.